Laughs

S-E-X Sitter

By  | 

I was at a party over the summer, and a woman I had never met started talking about her S-E-X Sitter.

What is that you ask?

Well, her S-E-X Sitter arrives every Saturday morning at 6 am. She lets herself into the house and waits for the children to start coming down the stairs.

She makes them breakfast. Lets them watch cartoons. Helps them get dressed.

Keeps them quiet.

She leaves at 11 am, when the parents come downstairs.

My mouth dropped to my toes as this woman told me about her special situation.

I mean – can you imagine not having to come downstairs until 11 am on a Saturday morning? The extra sleep you could get? The leisurely shower you could take? The coffee you could drink? (assuming you bring your coffee pot to your bedroom the night before.) The paper you could read?

And I guess it would be worth it to have S-E-X every Saturday morning if that helped your husband justify the cost.

Right?

What would you do with a Saturday morning S-E-X sitter?

14 Comments

  1. Janine Huldie

    December 20, 2012 at 7:15 am

    I wouldn’t know what to do with her, because sadly I don’t remember the last time I slept in. It is like my body just won’t allow me to sleep past 7 am, thanks to two little people whether they are up or not. Sounds wonderful though and almost like a fairy tale to me, lol!

  2. sparkling74

    December 20, 2012 at 7:28 am

    Wow, I have total visions of Mary Poppins. She glides in, casts spells on the children and glides back out. So independent. Can’t be true. It must only work if you have a nice, large house, where the bedroom is FAR away from the regular action, so Saturday morning action can take place!!

  3. VenusGenetrix

    December 20, 2012 at 8:58 am

    Our nooky nanny is Sponge Bob. 😛

  4. Inna

    December 20, 2012 at 9:07 am

    Sounds dreamy… 😀 Not going to work in our tiny house though. Sigh.

  5. mollie d

    December 20, 2012 at 10:13 am

    F-ING GENIUS!

  6. Lyndsey P

    December 20, 2012 at 10:29 am

    Brilliant! I wish we had a 2nd floor to make this work!

  7. VenusGenetrix

    December 20, 2012 at 10:47 am

    Man, what is up with all these comments lamenting a small house that can’t make this work?? I live in a tiny, one-floor apartment and that never stops us! Just need to let them turn those cartoons up nice & loud, tell them the night before what breakfast they can make for themselves (usually at our house it’s a bowl of cereal or a granola bar & piece of fruit), and if anyone hears anything, you’re just having a grown-ups only tickle war!! 😛

    What?? I’m teaching them independence & self-reliance. 🙂 My kids have known how to pour themselves a bowl of cereal & glass of milk since they were 4 years old – I’d say that’s pretty good parenting! lol

  8. Jen

    December 20, 2012 at 12:17 pm

    S.E.X Sitter is G.E.N.I.U.S.!!!

    Wonder if I could find one who is also willing to clean toilets??

  9. Bethany @ Bad Parenting Moments

    December 21, 2012 at 1:18 am

    I bet this friend is super fun at parties. Also, this is genius.

  10. thedoseofreality

    December 21, 2012 at 11:59 am

    Best.Idea.Ever. Where do I find one?

  11. Michelle

    December 21, 2012 at 12:39 pm

    Older siblings, the old Super Nintendo, and permission for them to play Donkey Kong as long as Mom doesn’t hear a sound … that’s all you need.

    Am I the only one who finds the idea of someone else slipping into the house so you can sleep in creepy?

  12. Heidi

    December 22, 2012 at 3:27 pm

    WAT?!

    Great idea! 😀

  13. Robin Jingjit

    December 24, 2012 at 8:28 am

    I’m with the first commenter who can’t sleep in. I can’t do it anymore! I mean, I can lay around and read a book, or just sit there and stare at nothing. Both are hard to do with little kids, so I wouldn’t complain if I got to do either on a Saturday. But to actually sleep in, I can’t do it!

    I think it would be weird… I would 100% force my husband to be the one to go down and pay her, while I was “busy” upstairs.

  14. Kiyara

    January 2, 2013 at 4:19 pm

    Posted on Hello, my name is Alex, i’m a newbie here. I rellay do like your resource and rellay interested in things you discuss here, also would like to enter your community, hope it is possible:-) Cya around, best regards, Alex!

You must be logged in to post a comment Login