My Life

What Pregnancy Has Done to My Body

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Having three kids in three years has wreaked havoc on my body. In the past four years, I have gained and lost over 100 pounds.  But I’ve found that the numbers don’t mean a thing  – because my body will never, ever be the same.

A friend of mine also had three kids in as many years. We decided that someone should have told us (or SHOWN us) what this would do to our bodies. So – here goes…

#1 After each pregnancy, my hair fell out. And then grew back. And every single time, I ended up with gray hair for awhile. The gray was so bad after Alice, that I had to dye it for about a year. It hasn’t been as bad after Simon – and I haven’t had to dye my hair in over a year. But I always know that the gray will come post baby.

#2One eye is much larger than the other. Even Steven says I’ve always looked like this – but I don’t think so. Pretty sure I would have noticed that…

#3 My ears stick WAY out. Again – Even Steven says my ears have always stuck out this far. I think he’s full of it.

#4 Let’s just say that these poor things are nearly sliding down into my underwear. The good news is that I can breastfeed Simon while I’m driving the car – I just swing one behind my back and into his car seat if he gets hungry while we’re running errands.

#5 – Cellulite, sagging, weird bulges… it’s not pretty.

#6 – Did you really think I was going to go there? Not a chance!

#7 – Oh man – I have some killer veins from all this. I even had to wear compression hose during my last pregnancy. And my lovely vein specialist says there’s definitely vein surgery in my future – and more compression hose. Achy legs, bruises, swelling …

#8 – My feet are HUGE!

#9 – Huge SMILE on my face!

Even though I will never recognize my body again – it was clearly all worth it. Right? Right?

Welcome to My Life and Kids! My name is Anna, and I had three kids in three years. Then I quit my job, moved to the suburbs and bought a minivan. In my spare time, I blog about it all…
Here are a few of my favorite posts:
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43 Comments

  1. Beth

    September 14, 2011 at 11:53 am

    Girl, I can relate from #1-9! That pictuure is priceless! Hope Miles had a great first day!

  2. Anonymous

    September 14, 2011 at 11:54 am

    LOVE this!

  3. .Amelia.Bedelia.

    September 14, 2011 at 1:02 pm

    Excuse me as i pee myself {another side effect of motherhood} and die from laughter!! 🙂
    This just made my day!
    ~Amy
    amy-showalter.blogspot.com

  4. Erin

    September 14, 2011 at 2:13 pm

    #4 Made me laughed until I cried. Thanks for that!!

  5. katie

    September 14, 2011 at 3:31 pm

    Do your boobs hang low, can you tie 'em in a bow, can tie 'em in a knot, can you….throw them in the back seat to feed…..!!!

    SOO DARN FUNNY – when will you compile all your posts into a book?

  6. Anonymous

    September 14, 2011 at 7:28 pm

    You're so funny! Those that are on the fence about having children may never get off if they read this! Ha Ha Ha!!!

  7. Anonymous

    September 15, 2011 at 1:23 am

    Hi Anna! Thanks for the great post!

    I only had one pregnancy, but I can recommend Tracy Anderson Post-pregnancy workout. She recommends exercising 4-6 times a week. I know, a lot but you REALLY can come close to where you were before. It's hard to find the time for every mom. I am a working mother, but I try to do it between 2-4 times a week. It's a great exercise to get the saggy skin back to the muscle – on your arms, tummy, butt, thighs…
    And I can recommend Stein Mart underwear department for body problem #4.

  8. Lady Goo Goo Gaga

    September 15, 2011 at 2:24 am

    My fingers grew too, even after I lost weight my rings never fit again….ugh

  9. Lauri

    September 15, 2011 at 8:49 pm

    Great posts lately! Love your writing style, so much fun to read! 🙂

  10. Melanie

    September 16, 2011 at 5:38 pm

    i think they should pass this out at the ob-gyn's office. maybe to peruse while drinking the glucose drink or something. all of these things are so SO true. 3 babies in 3 years…geez, what were we thinking?! 🙂

  11. ~Iffy~ @ StayAtHomeNation

    September 19, 2011 at 6:28 pm

    Mommy of 4 here, my last 2 are both under 2 and I can relate as well. My allergies are driving me nuts with all my sneezing…(and peeing lol) OH me oh my, but yes I wouldn't trade the little darlings for the world. I love my kiddies & though yes our bodies are maxed out through pregnancies & post, just know that you are loved unconditionally by those little angels & they don't even notice the imperfections we see in ourselves, so enjoy every minute you can with them & making memories because before you know it they will be grown. Sorry to ramble but to answer your question yes, right it is worth it! XOXO
    ~Iffy~

    Stopping by from the Cure For the Common Monday Party & had to say hello!
    http://www.StayAtHomeNation.blogspot.com

  12. Tricia

    September 20, 2011 at 4:30 am

    I also had 3 in 3 years and loved this post. So true!

  13. Shelley

    September 20, 2011 at 1:12 pm

    Ahhh hahahahaha!!!! Coffee shot out of my nose and I'm pretty sure a little pee came out (another post baby "trick") 😀

    You are too funny my friend, thanks for sharing!

    Shelley
    http://www.westermanfam.blogspot.com

  14. Abby

    September 22, 2011 at 1:59 am

    Love it. I have triplets…. so just imagine having 3 at once would do to your body 🙂

    http://thriftywithtriplets.blogspot.com/2011/09/crayola-crayon-painting.html

  15. Erin

    October 5, 2011 at 2:16 am

    Oh Anna – how I love you. I laughed so hard at #4 that I could barely breath (doesn't help that this soon-to-arrive baby is sitting in my rib cage right now!). Thanks for the laugh! We're coming to see you guys. Seriously. It will actually happen this month…

  16. becauseithinkican

    December 1, 2011 at 8:58 pm

    I LOVE your letters, Anna! It's like you write everything that I don't even want to admit I think about! Love your honesty.
    hugs,
    Leanne

  17. Abby

    December 28, 2011 at 1:19 pm

    Too funny and waaaaay true! Thanks for the laugh!

  18. Our Happy Homeschool

    December 28, 2011 at 3:52 pm

    Love this post! And I LOVE those sweet faces! Yes, it was all worth it. 🙂

  19. Elise

    December 28, 2011 at 7:17 pm

    Oooh, #4 is way too true.. and I only have one!

    BTW, that picture of your kids is awesome! LOL

  20. Elise

    December 28, 2011 at 7:19 pm

    One kid I mean 😛

  21. [email protected]

    January 4, 2012 at 5:09 am

    ANOTHER great post that makes me want you to be my neighbor. I’m sure I could laugh quite a while with you! Might need to wear some Depends! This was the most viewed link last week at Whatever Goes Wednesday. I am highlighting it today.

  22. lisa

    January 4, 2012 at 8:53 am

    Great post! I love it!

  23. Mamie

    January 4, 2012 at 1:02 pm

    I can totally relate to all of this! I had four deliveries in four years! I used to wear a 36B bra, now I wear a 36 long.

  24. Brittany

    January 4, 2012 at 5:11 pm

    Love this!!!

  25. Sarah

    January 5, 2012 at 1:41 am

    HiLarious!

    I love #4, ain’t it the truth. Such refreshing honesty! I had three in just over 4 years and I feel your pain! But the huge smile is worth every sag 🙂

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  27. Lesley

    January 13, 2012 at 9:20 am

    Just found this – I can totally relate!! Am having horrible issues with legs/veins this time around and surgery will probably be in my future as well (an added bonus the 4th pregnancy is throwing at me). Takes me 20 minutes to get into those compression tights. Am going to google rubber gloves now – does that really work? Thanks for the laugh!

  28. Deanna @ Little Green Bow

    January 31, 2012 at 3:42 am

    AHHHH! This is scary stuff. No kiddos yet for me and as much as I am looking forward to little ones soon, I will be sad to see my body go. I know it’s totally worth it, but really, why is nature so cruel?

  29. Amanda

    January 31, 2012 at 12:05 pm

    FUNNY!!! I have 3 kids 4 and under!! I can totally relate to the body changes and the peeing yourself comment!! So funny! MADE MY DAY!!!

  30. Sarah

    February 3, 2012 at 9:38 am

    Too funny! Don’t even want to mention what happens to #6!! Ugh. Not pretty. I had the varicose veins too and just had the surgery last year. So worth it.

  31. Jaimie

    April 9, 2012 at 11:01 pm

    The mental image I have from #4 has me laughing so hard I’m nearly crying. And my husband is looking at me like I’m crazy. I’ve spent nearly an hour reading posts on your blog…boy, am I glad I found you! You are hilarious!!

  32. Creating Sarah

    April 12, 2012 at 12:57 pm

    This cracked me up! I wish I had read this before I got pregnant (not that it would have changed anything!). I’m now pregnant with my third and I’m still not sure what my body is going to do after this one is born. Oh the adventures of woman/motherhood!

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  34. Blondie

    June 7, 2012 at 1:38 pm

    Just coming across your blog and love it! Thanks for the humor about what pregnancy does to the body and I have to hope that photoshop has something to do with Tori’s body at the moment. It is just not right!! Look forward to reading more posts.

  35. Kim

    July 17, 2012 at 6:11 pm

    LOL! Yep, all of the above!

  36. Laura @ Stroller Parking Only

    August 8, 2012 at 6:19 pm

    I LOOOOOVE LOVE LOVE this post. I can totally relate to everything in it, except that I only have one kid. I lost all the baby weight and then some, but my poor muffin top is madly in love with me and refuses to leave me. It’s so worth it though. The picture of your kids at the end is priceless.

  37. raffaella

    September 18, 2012 at 6:41 am

    soooo nice and so true!!! congrats for your blog,nit’s really interesting. raffaella

  38. Mary

    October 24, 2012 at 2:10 am

    Oh,my God!!! I’ve got the other type of husband! He sais my hair’s become too grey,my ears are stiking,my head’s become much bigger,my nose has never been that huge!! My belly looks like i’m constantly pregnant. But still he manages to say that he loves me,and i believe him-why else would he live with such a monster)))

  39. Hannah

    December 4, 2012 at 1:51 am

    I’m only 16 , but I no longer want to have.kids!! Adoption may be the best option.

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  41. C Marrin

    February 6, 2013 at 3:52 am

    I’ve written a partial response to this! From another point of view.

    http://butternutb.wordpress.com/2013/02/06/187/

    Love your site. Hi from England!

  42. Ally

    February 11, 2013 at 8:34 pm

    Count your blessings on the veins, it could be worse. I’m 21 and I noticed my varicose veins about two years ago. Since, I’ve build up a collection of support hose, gone through vein surgery in one leg, bought a wedge pillow to elevate my leg at night, and been ordered by my doctor to wear the stockings nonstop, excluding sleeping, the moment I even consider pregnancy. I’m dead terrified of what they will look like/feel be like after I have kids.

  43. Frammitz

    March 20, 2013 at 9:17 am

    I’ve been getting gray hair. Baby is 10 months old now. Can this be related to the pregnancy? Will it change back?

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