My Life

My Birthday Wish

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My birthday is this weekend, and there’s only one thing I really want this year.

It involves Even Steven.

And the bedroom…

Happy Even Steven

If you’re a mom, I’m sure you know exactly what I want for my birthday.

I want to switch sides of the bed.

A long, long time ago, when Even Steven and I were getting ready for our wedding, he said he was a little nervous about getting married.

Fear of commitment? Nope.

Worried about being married so young? Nope.

Even Steven was worried about having to sleep on the same side of the bed for the rest of his life. He just couldn’t decide which side he wanted, and he was afraid he’d choose the wrong side and regret it for the rest of his days.

So I assured him that we could switch sides of the bed whenever he wanted.

At first it was once a week. Then it became once a month. Sometimes it was his idea. Sometimes it was my idea.

This went on for more than 5 years. Until we brought our first child home from the hospital.

And that’s when I said something that I have regretted ever since:

No more switching sides of the bed. I have to be able to hear the baby. I need to be able to get out of bed.

I need to sleep near the door.

And for nearly 6 years, I have slept closest to the door.

I am the one that hears the kids calling for us.

I am the one that keeps one ear open for burglars.

I am the one that the kids stare at in the middle of the night when they just want to get into bed and “snuggle.”

I am the one that the kids whisper to at 5:30 in the morning to say that they’re hungry or hot or thirsty or just want to GET UP.

It’s me.

And now that I am advancing in age, I’m ready to retire my side of the bed.

My friend Krista at All Aboard My Train of Thought says that my kids will find me whether I’m next to the door or the window. (Or in the guest room or on the couch).

But I figure it’s worth a shot – don’t you think?

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27 Comments

  1. Janine Huldie

    March 29, 2013 at 7:13 am

    I think it totally worth a shot and I too sleep near the door and thinking it may be time for a change-up, because your argument was so compelling, lol!! Seriously, Happy Birthday Anna and hope you have a great weekend!! πŸ™‚

  2. freelsda

    March 29, 2013 at 7:28 am

    Doesn’t matter which side. Kids vomiting during the night, thumps as they fall out of bed – dads never hear it. Or they are just really, really good at sleep faking.

  3. Lyn

    March 29, 2013 at 7:38 am

    I’ve slept nearest the door now for twenty years. I agree with freelsda. Dads never “hear” it.

  4. Jen

    March 29, 2013 at 7:52 am

    I used to sleep by the door. Kids would do all you mentioned. We swapped sides because he is the first up for work in the morning. He felt bad about disturbing me at 5 am. So swap happened. It doesn’t matter to the kids though. Even if there is no room left on my end due to husband rolling to cuddle and I’m trying not to fall out, my 6 yr old son will come and “want” me cause he is cold or scared or lonely. “Daddy has more space though” I say… “No mommy, I want you” and what can I say but scoop him onto my arms and cuddle?

  5. Danielle @ A Wishful Whimsy

    March 29, 2013 at 8:07 am

    Happy Birthday for the weekend! It is only since our son was born 20 months ago that hubby and I have been switching sides of the bed, before that I always was closest to the door but now it just depends on who gets into bed first and where we end up when the kids all climb in. I am rarely in my bed anymore with a teething toddler so I have pretty much forgotten what a bed is, let alone care which side I sleep on. lol. I used to freak out as a child if Mum ever slept on Dads side of the bed, cause if I went in to them and Dad was on Mums side, it completely threw me off track!

  6. Katie

    March 29, 2013 at 8:20 am

    Man. You’re lucky Even Steven lets you swap sides. When my husband and I got married, we realized we both slept on the same side of the bed. So what does my brand new husband do? Compromise? Offer to side-share with weekly swaps? Let his beautiful bride take the side where she’s most comfortable.

    No. He said, “It’s my bed. I get to sleep on that side. You have to sleep on the other side.” Since I was unable to argue with that logic, I’ve been sleeping on the wrong side of the bed for almost five years now.

    When he’s out of town, I totally steal his side. Also for naps.

  7. sparkling74

    March 29, 2013 at 8:54 am

    Don’t you DARE touch my side of the bed! To me, it’s like wearing someone’s underwear. Poor k-ster will have sleep on his side forever. He asked me recently if I want to switch and I said nowaynowaynowaynoway. I’d wake up not knowing where I was! I’d sleep facing his breath all night! It would never work. Plus, he’s closest to the door for burglars and I’m closest to the door to the bathroom πŸ™‚

  8. Pam

    March 29, 2013 at 9:00 am

    Happy Birthday!!! My birthday was on the 27th. Your kids will find you no matter what. My kids will walk past my husband and up a flight of stairs to ask me to come downstairs and fix them a snack. Really?

  9. Melanie S

    March 29, 2013 at 9:06 am

    Happy Birthday. I HAVE to sleep on the right side of the bed no matter what the position it is to the door. And it’s for a completely logical reason. I am a stomach sleeper and I have to have on foot sticking out of the covers. And it can only be my right foot. If I do the left foot, I can’t sleep. And if I’m in my side and allowing my husband to cuddle with (something that annoys me after having kids, I’m tired of being touched all day and just want to sleep) then my right foot is on top and can stick out. See, completely logical.

  10. Gina

    March 29, 2013 at 9:13 am

    LOL! My son does this too! I am like “where is your dad?” Oh yes, he was sitting next to you on the couch! …..

  11. thedoseofreality

    March 29, 2013 at 9:15 am

    Go for it! Although, just a sneaking suspicion, but I bet the children will still find you. It is like they just know.

  12. Leighan Swenson

    March 29, 2013 at 9:50 am

    I am SO with you on the not wanting to be touched thing! Hubs doesn’t get it – he complained that he’s been at work all day and only gets a small amount of time to be close to me…which is true and a fair point. But I have someone touching me ALL DAY LONG and sometimes I just want my space!

    Happy birthday, Anna!

  13. Queen mama of 3

    March 29, 2013 at 9:51 am

    They will find you. Or they will talk so loudly that it will be just like they found you, only your husband will act so confused over being woken that the conversation will drag on and on until you just deal with the child yourself.

  14. Momchalant

    March 29, 2013 at 10:07 am

    I went through this same problem when I first moved in with my boyfriend. Then we had a baby months later.. (We shared bedroom) I wanted to be the closest to the crib but that was “his side.” Unlike Even Steven, he NEVER wanted to switch. I was forced to remain on “my side.”

    My birthday was two months after my son was born.. That would have been a great present to ask for. Simple and cheap.

    To this day, (My son has his own room now) we still sleep on the same side of the bed as we started on.

  15. Heather McD

    March 29, 2013 at 11:33 am

    My birthday was last weekend and as a new mom of an [almost] 3 month old, all I asked for was a nap and a meal that I didn’t have to cook or clean up after! I’m happy to report that I got both of those requests, so there might be hope for yours, too! Happy early birthday!!

  16. Heather T

    March 29, 2013 at 12:30 pm

    Hahahaha yeah worth a try, let us know how that works out, I am about ready to switch back to my side the youngest of 4 kids is getting close to a year old, and I am about ready to be done nursing and damn it when someone breaks in I want them to get the DH first, oh wait did that come out of my mouth! Happy birthday by the way, mine is 4/3 my DH is today, he is lucky he has made it this far.

  17. Kathy at kissing the frog

    March 29, 2013 at 1:03 pm

    Yep, I agree. I think they’ll find you no matter what side of the bed you’re in.

  18. Michelle

    March 29, 2013 at 2:05 pm

    Good luck with that! I’ve had the same side of the bed for 22 years now.

  19. Mom

    March 29, 2013 at 3:46 pm

    I was terrified when I started reading your blog. Fortunately I read past your opening statement.

    Happy Birthday Darling Daughter!

  20. Krista

    March 29, 2013 at 6:31 pm

    I still think that it would be super fun if you surprised him one day by turning the whole dang bed around! It’d be worth a try, right? Thanks for the shout out. You are a hoot.

  21. Anna

    March 29, 2013 at 10:50 pm

    Happy Birthday! I hope your good-side-of-the-bed wish comes true!

  22. Skyline family

    March 29, 2013 at 11:39 pm

    Give it a try, but my hubby sleeps closest to the door, and he still does not hear the kids or random burglars. Happy Birthday as well!!

  23. Annalise

    March 29, 2013 at 11:41 pm

    Happy Birthday! It’s my birthday this weekend too! It is my hub’s bday today. When we first got married and he asked me if we could do our birthdays together(the day after his and the day before mine) and I told him fat chance I get my own birithday! Hope you have a good one and get your birthday wish!

  24. Mai Bateson

    March 30, 2013 at 6:12 am

    Funny story! But I love it… My hubby and I are just talking about it today. When I get home sometime this May (cuz we’re still working on the petition papers), I know what side of the bed I will choose. lol Happy birthday, Anna!!!! πŸ˜€

  25. Robin Jingjit

    March 31, 2013 at 5:45 am

    He “won’t hear them”. My hubs never does πŸ™‚

  26. Amy

    March 31, 2013 at 11:30 pm

    Happy birthday! Switching sides will work for a while. The kids have been trained to go to the side closest to the door, so Even Steven will get the middle of the night visits for a bit. I guess you could switch back as soon as they start remembering.

  27. Kim

    April 1, 2013 at 10:55 am

    I totally agree with Krista. From time to time my husband stakes claim on my side of the bed. The kids still wander around the bed to find me. Or sometimes if I’m not sleeping well I’ll move to the recliner in the living room and they’ll come downstairs and find me. Like there’s any waking Daddy up from his restful slumber anyway….

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