As you know, my mom made sure I remained a virgin all through high school.
At the time, I didn’t care a single bit about being a virgin (or about my terrible haircut or my manly muscles).
In fact, I was the president of my school’s chastity club.
I guess I should rephrase that – first I STARTED the chastity club at my school.
Then I named myself president as I was the only member at the time.
I forced my friends to become members, and we held a public ceremony in the gym where we swore to remain virgins until the day we were married.
Our parents were downright giddy and bought us flowers and chastity rings to wear on our right ring fingers.
I envisioned my wedding night – standing in a hotel room with my husband, gazing romantically into his eyes and slipping the chastity ring off my finger and giving it to him.
He would say, “You were worth the wait.” just before taking my virginity.
I’m sure it will shock you to learn that things didn’t exactly happen that way. But that’s a post for another day. Or maybe never, actually.
Back to high school…
My virginity club quickly gained in popularity – partly because I provided baked goods at our monthly meetings – but mainly because I encouraged born-again virgins.
Born-again virgins are people that have had sex in the past, and vow not to have sex again until they are married. The best part about my born-again virgin policy was that you could become a born-again virgin over and over and over again. We were all about second (and third and fourth and fifth) chances.
You could become a born-again virgin every month if you wanted to – just as long as it was before our monthly meeting.
Luckily for my daughter, I have all of my Chastity Club agendas and meeting minutes saved in a box for her.
The day before she starts high school, we’ll head straight to Great Clips to give her the awesome haircut of my youth.
And in-between her body-building sessions, she can use my old Chastity Club notebooks as a guide to create a club of her very own.