My Husband

A Letter to Younger Anna

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Dear Younger Anna,

*Your hair is just awful, terrible and more terrible. Don’t listen to your mother when she tells you it’s wonderful. She’s a liar. You need to grow your hair out now (and stop putting french fries up your nose.)

*Seriously – your mom is a liar. You don’t have a special voice gene – you won’t get paralyzed if you participate in organized dance classes – and you aren’t going to Disney World.

*Don’t run that marathon. It really isn’t worth it. (Which means don’t drink and surf the internet with your credit card.)

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*Stop eating Crisco out of the can. Just put the spoon down now.

*There are 50 states – not 52.

*You know how excited you were when your brother got that BB gun? Don’t be. He’s going to shoot you with it – more than once.

*The Spanish foreign exchange student understands pig latin. In fact, pretty much everyone except for your mom understands pig latin.

*You’re going to marry that boy in the duck boots. Don’t worry when he doesn’t call you right away – he will eventually.

*Teaching everyone your favorite party trick isn’t the most professional thing to do during a job interview – even if you did get the job.

*Stop asking people to punch you in the face as hard as they can. Even if you are wearing a fencing mask. It makes Even Steven mad.

*You’re making the right choice to quit your job. You’re going to love staying home with your kids. (But you will miss a few things about daycare.)

*That house that you hated the first time you walked through it… you know – the one covered in wallpaper and nicotine stains? You’re going to buy it and LOVE it. Seriously.

*You don’t have to have all three of your kids in three years. It wouldn’t kill you to spread them out a little bit (but I know you won’t listen to that one.)

*You’re going to get mean comments on your blog. People are going to be talking crap about you in chat rooms. Not everyone is going to enjoy reading. It’s okay. This blog could go away tomorrow, and you’d still have three adorable kids and an Even Steven. Who could ask for more than that?

*Simon is going to be a climber. Get ready.

Simon is a Climber

12 Comments

  1. Mhikkai

    April 17, 2012 at 6:43 am

    Hmm. I can definitely relate to you here.. Anyway, kid is almost climbing too just like yours.. Sometimes I get afraid when I can’t look for them even just for a second..

  2. Dawn

    April 17, 2012 at 8:16 am

    Well, I have finally out done you in one area- I let my daughter jump on my laptop when she was a toddler…hence the end of the laptop. I blame the loss of brain cells during birth. I love you, your humor and your blog. I cannot believe that anyone would say mean things or comments about it. Let me know where they live- I’ll take care of them…OK, that’s not very Christian, I meant I will speak a few gracious words over them and I bet they would be afraid to say mean things forever. Anyway- I will have to read through your stories later…perhaps while I am waiting for hubby’s little dental extraction today. Keep blogging! 😉

  3. Kai

    April 17, 2012 at 9:30 am

    Is it WRONG to want to adopt someone who already has a perfectly WONDERFUL mommy? Maybe your sweet mom will let me ‘co-own’ you! What say you, Anna’s mom? I love the idea of writing a letter to your younger self! Would you object (IF I credit you with the idea, of course) to my doing that on MY blog? I think it would be a very cleansing exercise! LOVE this post! And Simon? Sigh … couldn’t BE any cuter!

  4. Kim

    April 17, 2012 at 9:47 am

    I am with Dawn on graciously speaking a few words over the crazies that gave you mean comments…I am going to have to read the 52 states things…and secretly look it up…because now I am baffled, I really thought there were 52. The sad part is I am currently teaching geography to my middle child who is homeschooled…in my defense we are going state by state. I don’t believe I have made the statement “There are 52 states” maybe….

  5. Kimberly

    April 17, 2012 at 1:41 pm

    Hi! I just had to comment because I noticed that next to your little climber is the exact same planner I own and use and my life would fall apart if I didn’t have. Gotta love Barnes & Noble. =)

  6. Paige Kellerman

    April 17, 2012 at 2:56 pm

    I second the no drinking with credit card while surfing the internet advice. I wish I could go back and tell myself that no one wanted to see me in lemon yellow belly dancing pants…ever.

  7. imklvr

    April 17, 2012 at 4:04 pm

    In the next letter you write to your younger self, mention writing a book, ‘k? Plant the seed, as they say. hehe

  8. JD @ Honest Mom

    April 17, 2012 at 10:10 pm

    Crisco? Out of the CAN?! Ewwwwwww!

    I had awful hair, too. Permed. With straight bangs. ‘Nuff said.

  9. Jenni

    April 18, 2012 at 9:33 am

    Really enjoyed this post. I wish I could send my younger self a few things. =)

  10. Bugs

    April 18, 2012 at 9:22 pm

    So so so funny and sweet! Thanks for the giggles.

  11. Dalai Lina

    April 22, 2012 at 6:44 pm

    Oh, honey, can I relate to the hair. How were perms ever in style? th

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