I Love Crisco – and My Mom’s Twitchy Eye

I spent the last week at my parents’ house with the kids. I drove my mom a little nuts, but it wasn’t too bad because we were at her house. Which meant that she had 20 boxes of kleenex in her basement and no less than 40 rolls of paper towels – and don’t even…

Crazy Texts from My Mother

My mom has had her iPhone for at least a year. And every time I see her she tells me how amazing it is and how much I’m missing in life by not owning one. I’m sure she’s right. But I rarely listen to her advice, so I’m still holding out with my Windows Phone……

Why I Don’t Have a Wedding Video

When my brother and sister-in-law got married, it was an absolutely perfect day. They were so in love and so beautiful and happy. There seemed to be a special glow surrounding the church, and when you stepped inside, you could feel the happiness and joy and love. It was perfect. The next morning, we all…

Dear Mom

Dear Mom, Remember the time when I was about 10 years old, and we pulled into the driveway and my brother was shooting hoops on the basketball court? And instead of turning off the car and getting out, we pulled up to the edge of the court and every time he made a basket, you’d…

How to Keep Your Daughter a Virgin: The Prequel

A few months ago, I wrote a post called, How To Keep Your Daughter a Virgin for As Long as Possible. At the time that I wrote it, I thought that my mom’s Virgin Strategy started with my super, amazing haircut in high school. But in looking through old pictures – and based on my…

TEN Blog Posts My Mom Hates

Update: In the four months since I originally wrote this post, my mom has a few more posts that she doesn’t like a single bit. I’m adding them here – to make it TEN posts that my mom hates… In case you didn’t know, my mom is pretty much my biggest fan. Every morning, I…

Greek Girls Can’t Jump

By the time I hit 7th grade, I was full grown. At 5 feet, 6 inches tall, I looked down at all of the junior high boys, and I outweighed the guys and the girls by a good 30 – 40 pounds. I got used to people saying, “You know how you’re not fat, you’re…

I Am My Mother

When I was growing up, we hosted most of the family get togethers at our house. Aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, neighbors – it seemed like there was a reason to celebrate at our house nearly every single month. Which meant that every single month, we would spend an entire morning trying to avoid my mother.…

Ruff Ruff

When I was growing up, we had a Cocker Spaniel dog named Ramona Quimby. (Yes, I got to name her. Yes, I was in 2nd grade and reading the Ramona Quimby books at the time.) Ramona was an amazing dog. She loved to snuggle and eat. And eat. And eat some more. At one point,…